I once suggested to my mother that I might like to become a nurse. Her immediate response was, "over my dead body!"

My mother, Helen Goertzen had been an LPN most of her life, beginning before my sister and I were born. We moved from Ontario to Manitoba in 1967, and it took a few years before she could update her nursing to Manitoba requirements. My dad had a heart condition for 25 years, so she was the main breadwinner for our household until she retired at age 65. She worked extremely hard as a nurse, and had no wish for that life on either of her daughters.

But I took on the role of nurse for a month. I managed appointments, phone calls, pills, meals, house cleaning and made my darling husband as comfortable as possible for the 34 days from diagnosis until his death.

Since losing my first husband at age 45, I was always a wee bit paranoid about losing my second husband. If he was out in the garage too long, I would occasionally check on him. If he slept in, I would peek in and make sure his chest was rising and falling.

I made a huge effort to keep him safe during the pandemic, and now he is gone. But I wouldn't trade a single moment with him. I loved caring for him.

Friends and family dropped by for visits. Some folks we hadn't seen for a very long time. The visits were tiring for him, but he enjoyed them. His sons, their wives and grandchildren came by often, and their medical expertise opened doors so that he got the best of medical care. My precious husband died on February 24th at Seven Oaks Hospital as I read scripture to him and I told him how much I love him. 

So now is a new stage in my life. It feels really strange that it seems I am trying to erase him from my life. I have to change all the bank accounts, insurance, turn in his passport and his drivers license. His clothes can't remain in the closets forever, and I will need to wash his pillowcase one day.

One thing I know for sure is that with so many people praying for me, I am sure to be able to continue on. Indeed, it won't be easy, but I will take it one day at a time. Thank you to everyone who have prayed, sent flowers, food and encouragement. It is so appreciated!